Monday, April 21, 2014

Mom Fail

I have every intention of not making this a tried and true “Mom Blog”, but here’s the truth of the matter. I’m a mom. I blog. The two shall converge. Especially because 98.9% of my life is my son. Let’s call son “R” for the sake of this blog and the land of crazy Internets.

As a mom, I try to be a realist. R is a boy through and through. He’s rough, falls a LOT, wants to eat dirt, play with bugs, fart in the bathtub. All those things that are gross and dangerous. I try my best to strike a balance between danger and a “boys will be boys” mentality.

Then you have what I like to call Mom Fails. Situations where motherhood has failed you. Or you have failed motherhood. Or both. Being a single mom I must realize that as much as I try to prevent them, these things happen. With that being said, my first true “Mother of the Year” moment was just this week at daycare.

Daycare is a magical place where R goes to play with his friends, share ridiculous amounts of germs, make poops and throw tantrums for someone other than me.

Daycare also comes with notes, shoved in diaper bags and lunch boxes that get lost in the abyss. Some notes are important like, YOUR SON NEEDS DIAPERS OR HE MUST POOP IN NEWSPAPER. Other notes say things like “Tomorrow is Wear Green Day, World Rat Day, Kiss a Frog Day.” Don’t care.

Well, apparently, I missed the note about the Easter Egg Hunt. Which detailed that each child should bring 6 filled eggs, plus a special basket of treats in order to participate in a super funtastic event.

Guess who didn’t have eggs? Or treats? Or a basket? Yes. My son. Luckily, I was not the only mom who neglected this note. And even more luckily, the teachers had extra eggs so that R wasn’t completely missing out on the fun.

Mom fail.

Most lucky of all, R is still young enough that he can’t form memories. Or know that his mom messed up majorly. I don’t think I have to start the “Things for R to Discuss in Therapy” list until he’s like...3? 4?

But before you start to be all like “Poor R. His mother neglected Easter fun and treats,” I’ll have you know this child is far from neglected. He has already received an Easter basket with many treats including outfits and Elmo paraphernalia, Little Tikes Grill, toy lawnmower and at least 2 Easter baskets on the way. In the grand scheme of things, I think missing the daycare egg hunt is a blip on the radar.

Guess I should read those daycare notes a little more carefully next time, eh?

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